See, my husband is kind of amazing. And he likes to spoil me. Enter Vern: my new robotic vacuum. I *may* have mentioned that I wanted one. Well, he thought to help eliminate some of my stress around the holidays and my compulsive need to vacuum every five hours or so, and thus - I became the proud owner of Vern, my automated vacuum.
I proudly plugged Vern in to charge last night and couldn't wait to unleash him this morning. The directions say he'll vacuum for two hours for a total of about 2100 sq. ft. Well...that's enough power to easily do my entire first floor! Go Vern! And because I'm mainly psychotic, I felt the need to follow him around for a large portion of my morning to discover what he would actually vacuum.
Here is what I've discovered:
- My cat, also likes to follow Vern around, with a 100% judgmental look on her face
- My dog is unimpressed by Vern and refuses to get up, forcing Vern to vacuum around her
- Vern has now vacuumed under my dining room table seven times. [Jesus, it must be REALLY dirty under there...]
- Vern is a primadonna and refuses to brave the carpet lip into my living room and vacuum in there; yet -
- Vern enjoys going baja'ing and flipping over my throw rugs in the kitchen
- Vern thinks charging cords are food and will stick around trying to eat them
- Vern especially enjoys driving up on... "Goddamnitall, Vern! Stop humping the telephone!"