So, have you ever found yourself living out little events in your mind? I needless to say, have a very vivid imagination. Just this AM, I found myself driving to work...following a [it had to be a stupid woman by the way she couldn't drive...giving the rest of our gender such a bad rap] freak who was all over the on-ramp on the highway. We're doing 40, no - 20, no - 50, back down to 30. She's in her lane, she's swerving toward the CONCRETE guardrails. She's back in her lane. WTF?
My mind has raced through all of the possibilities at this point to explain the erratic driving. She just had a stroke and is trying to save her life and keep it on the road until she can pull over...no. There is a killer bee in her car that is trying to attack her and she's trying to shoo it out the window...no. She is mentally retarded, and should not be driving, but her mom was too drunk to drive to McDonalds, and she was hungry...no. Hmmm, what could it be then?
The on-ramp comes to an end, and I have the opportunity to pass her - low and behold! She's applying her make up. And not just any make up...MASCARA!
And her window is open. Well, I don't know about you, but I many times struggle not to poke my eye out with that junk AND I'M ONLY STANDING AT MY BATHROOM VANITY!!! My mind wanders. I imagine her hitting a pothole and gouging that adorable baby blue out with a mascara wand. The horror when she arrives in the ER, having caused a 15 car pile up in the middle of rush hour, only to find they can't reattach it b/c there is too much goo to dredge out. What if her eye, heaven forbid, flung out the window at 60mph? What if I drove over it? Poor woman...how would she be able to apply the other eye tomorrow???
Seriously...how do some of these people get drivers licenses?
